Tuesday, August 25, 2009

It's nice to miss them!

My girls are staying at my parents house for a few days. I am enjoying the quiet, and the peace and the time. I am enjoying watching some daytime garbage on the TV. Yesterday I watched the Tyra show and the subject was super- fat people who want to get fatter so they can develop an internet following of people who love super fat people. Wow.

I miss the girls. Seriously! Life as I knew it radically changed when Genea moved in and I found out the ugly truth about having children. Two are NOT twice as hard as one. Somehow exponentials get involved (don't ask me, I went to public school in Illinois) and two are at least 10 times as hard as one. But here is the deal. I normally need the break so bad that I essentially collapse and remain where I landed until time to go get them back. When the adrenaline that I usually burn in overdrive would wear off, I would feel like I was just getting over the flu. Feeling better than I had, but any small movement caused an immediate relapse.

Things have gotten so much better this summer! All the problems we have had on and off are still lurking, but suddenly the really bad times are much much shorter. Genea hits bottom, and it is painful and horrible and devastating but, she pulls out. Instead of 2 or 3 weeks down there, it is maybe 5 days. Instead of nothing, nothing, slowing or redirecting or minimizing The Crazy, holding her slows it down. Taking her by the hand and turning her in a circle to "turn around" the sadness and crying works. It may work for only an hour, but we never had that hour before. Mid meltdown, I can ask her what color m&m is her favorite and she will stop to think about it and then answer.

Now, on another subject I can't complain because I did this to myself. I am raising both my girls to be very independent. I want them to be people who are happy in their own skin, content with themselves and confident in their abilities to take care of their own needs and wants throughout life. Having said that, it is starting to get on my nerves when I ask Teena if she misses me when she is away and she says "no". This last time she said, "I love you Mama and I love Gramma too!". Yeah, yeah, yeah. Genea, she misses me, and if she doesn't at least she has the sense to lie about it.


  1. Oh wow! On so many of your paragraphs here!

    Yes, two kids are more than twice the work of one -- it's reverse synergy or something.

    Sometimes I long for a break so bad, and I plot all the wonderful things I'm going to do when one comes along. But when one does come along, all I can pull off for at least 24 hours is staring at a wall. Hours can zip by while I'm in a semi-comatose state.

    Yay about Genea's healing!! You are doing great work.

  2. Wait...I thought you weren't doing Too True Tuesday, and here you've gone and fessed up to watching Tyra for nothing!! hehe.

    Yes, I agree, it is nice to be missed. As, in missing implies some alone time!

  3. Sounds like fun! I'm glad if my kids miss me, too...just not so much that they go berserk as a result.

  4. BTW - someone told me there was a Swedish saying, "One is like none; two is like ten." I thought that was true and my two were an easy two.

  5. Lay on the couch eating bon-bons all day.... I highly recommend it.

  6. Teena knows she'll see you soon. It's not like you're in a gulag somewhere where you may not be reunited for twenty years. She's happy with grandma and that's cool.
    I used to feel a wee bit jealous when my kids would go on and on about how good grandma's pancakes are (compared to mine, which always turn out like charcoal on the outside and runny inside) but now I don't mind so much, I just enjoy the peace and quiet when they're at her house.


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