Thursday, June 26, 2008

Bloody Flipping HOT

I take my toddler in her stroller and we walk to Genea's school to pick her up. Today is one of those days where the heat and humidity are almost visible. The sun is out and the air has weight. Like you could hold it in your hand. Walking, at first there was a breeze but by the last 2 blocks I had a sweat and I am not a fan of sweat, rest assured folks! The air is hot and the sun is hot and the humidity multiplies it all. The only way to survive today is to be still. This is not how toddlers are designed. They seem to be designed as little balls of exploding energy on a time table. And if you do not supply an explosion opportunity for them on their mysterious and changing schedule, they will make their own. It will not be pretty.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Should This Be Harder?

I hope I am not busting open a world-wide belief. I am new at this stay at home thing with the kids, really new, like 3 or 4 weeks of it new. I assumed I would be flying around crazy all day with piles of stuff to do and reams to clean up. But I am not. I have always heard that staying at home with the kids is the equivalent of going to work at a paid job. Both "jobs" are hard work with intense pressure and constantly shifting priorities.
I am guessing I am missing something, I usually am. But this is not hard. This is relatively easy. And I have a child with special needs and a toddler in her terrible three's.
Maybe its the result of the publisized "mommy wars". A job-working mom goes head to head with an at-home working mom, both convinced the other is dead wrong and sure to cause the precious little darlings years of trauma. Despite all that they both agree that staying home with your kids is just as much of a job as going out for a paycheck.
Well, I will certainly never tell my husband this, and luckily I have no readers lol. This is not hard, it just isn't! I have to pace myself to spread errands out over the week so we have stuff to do daily. I spent a half hour trying to decide if I should clean up the lunch dishes right away, or would it be more efficient to wait until there was a pile of dishes and load them all at once.
I can sleep much later, and I can take a nap when the girls do if I want. We play and do some learning activities. They go outside to play in the yard or we go to the park. We watch Dora. What is so hard about this?
I do not intend to burst anyone's balloon or rain on their parade. I just dont get it. When I worked, there was commute and time taking the kids to day care (which they loved). There was the pressure of the job and organizing medical appointments and therapy sessions etc. God forbid someone gets sick and I have to take a day off and make up the work later. Then still on top of all that having groceries and laundry and bills. It is way harder to be a mom and work an outside job! There is just shit-loads more work.
I see my mom job as turning out responsible, caring citizens with good common sense and I have 18 years to do it. My job is not to create my new life- long best friend, maybe that is the difference.

Monday, June 16, 2008

The Clothes Ladies, The Clothes!

I had this weekend free from my children. Love the little darlings, but they are consistently poorly behaved in public and so I took the opportunity to do some errands, shopping etc.
Can I ask, has everyone stopped caring at all what they look like? My gawd, ladies grab a hair brush. Use it! We must dispose of the Mommy Uniform. Discard all tan capri's, crop or otherwise shortened khaki style pants. There is more to life than khaki! Just trash them, burn them, whatever. The accompanying cardigan, usually white, has to go as well. Put it in the diaper bin if need be, to get it out of your hands. And the t-shirts. Yikes. Ladies Please!!! Wearing clothes a size too big makes you look BIGGER! This does you NO favors. Lord and the little loafers, did we not have enough of those in the 80's?
Have I landed on some horrible planet where there is this ugly uniform?
And the hair. Wow. Frosty highlighted flippy shoulder length 'do's are a (help me people) disaster! Please, if anyone sees me approximating this hair, shoot me in the leg. If I can be hospitalized I might be able to sleep and come to my senses on my own. This 'do however, seems to be for the mothers of toddlers and elementary school children. The worst, the absolute worst comes from the mothers of middle school and high school age kids. They have clearly given up. I can understand how you can get into a rut, you spend all day at home and no one cares what you look like so why should you bother. You should bother.

These are often the people who say they live for their children. They dedicate their lives to the most important job there is, the raising of their mini selves. As if looking like shit were part of the job description. I am sure had I asked, these ladies would say oh I have no time for myself, it's all about my kids. I have to bake cupcakes for 200 at school and make the drama class costumes from scratch by tomorrow and I just have so many people that need me I cannot take care of myself.
Ladies, I have this to say. If you cannot and will not value yourself, how can you think anyone else will? I hear women all the time complain about how they are dumped on and taken advantage of by others. They hate to confront and will NOT say the word no because they want everyone to like them. Grow a set. Grow a big set.
Good and holy shit people! Brush your hair! Go to Target and pick a box of hair color! And for chrissake get rid of those tan pants and cardigans.
That's all. Yes, I do feel better now.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

I Couldn't Have Said it Better

We check our oldest daughter (5) often for understanding. She was born in a foreign country and English is her second language. Additionally she has been non-communicative in the past to the point of getting a diagnosis of autism from a specialist. So, we explain a lot and check back a lot for understanding in the year she has been with us.
She said I Love You, and I said I Love you back.
I asked her, what does that mean, I Love You?
She said, it means to be part of our family silly mama- did you forget?
Ah, well, that sounds about right.


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