Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Should This Be Harder?

I hope I am not busting open a world-wide belief. I am new at this stay at home thing with the kids, really new, like 3 or 4 weeks of it new. I assumed I would be flying around crazy all day with piles of stuff to do and reams to clean up. But I am not. I have always heard that staying at home with the kids is the equivalent of going to work at a paid job. Both "jobs" are hard work with intense pressure and constantly shifting priorities.
I am guessing I am missing something, I usually am. But this is not hard. This is relatively easy. And I have a child with special needs and a toddler in her terrible three's.
Maybe its the result of the publisized "mommy wars". A job-working mom goes head to head with an at-home working mom, both convinced the other is dead wrong and sure to cause the precious little darlings years of trauma. Despite all that they both agree that staying home with your kids is just as much of a job as going out for a paycheck.
Well, I will certainly never tell my husband this, and luckily I have no readers lol. This is not hard, it just isn't! I have to pace myself to spread errands out over the week so we have stuff to do daily. I spent a half hour trying to decide if I should clean up the lunch dishes right away, or would it be more efficient to wait until there was a pile of dishes and load them all at once.
I can sleep much later, and I can take a nap when the girls do if I want. We play and do some learning activities. They go outside to play in the yard or we go to the park. We watch Dora. What is so hard about this?
I do not intend to burst anyone's balloon or rain on their parade. I just dont get it. When I worked, there was commute and time taking the kids to day care (which they loved). There was the pressure of the job and organizing medical appointments and therapy sessions etc. God forbid someone gets sick and I have to take a day off and make up the work later. Then still on top of all that having groceries and laundry and bills. It is way harder to be a mom and work an outside job! There is just shit-loads more work.
I see my mom job as turning out responsible, caring citizens with good common sense and I have 18 years to do it. My job is not to create my new life- long best friend, maybe that is the difference.

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