Thursday, April 16, 2009


To Lisa, the proud new mom, and it's a girl!

In the spirit of knowledge is power, I just have to say one thing. Because I know this will make no difference to Lisa or anyone else having another child, decisions will not be based on this information. However I think it is important to know. This is one of those things I wish someone had sent me a heads up about. It defies logic.

2 children are not twice as hard as 1. Right, like I said, that doesn't really make sense. Because 2 children somehow, are like four times as hard as one. At least four times. I failed math at least 4 times so I cannot be relied on to use exponentials properly. Just know this- there is a time or space warp that creates a funnel in the universe and the second child creates waaaaay more than twice the work.

When you have 2 girls, as I and the Obama's have, you will also discover that prisms cease to be relevant. Your world becomes made up of 3 colors. Pink, purple, and pinknpurple.

It will look as if Anna Nicole Smith blew up inside your house.

I wanted girls that do karate and play with worms. I got beautiful princesses instead. Which reminds me of one last thing. A little bit of sibling rivalry can be a great thing. Work with me here. If your kids tattle on each other to you, they will never quite be sure what they will get away with in front of each other. If they band together, well I don't want to scare you, but, they will win. The Husband and I have already decided that when it happens here, they can have the house. Just let us take one car to get away. Maybe we'll come stay with you!


  1. J was sitting at my feet reading and I startled her by laughing so loud. Hee hee....

    I'm with you...I was looking for the tomboy. Never going to happen and you're right another pink princess is going to be arriving. Pinknpurple threw up here already.

    I'm scared....truly terrified....
    You can't come here cause I'm running to your house. ;-)

  2. Oh, I so wanted a princess and got a beautiful karate-chopping, worm-digging little girl.

  3. To Essie (and Lisa,)
    If you just feed into a little ODD you really can get the karate chopping, worm playing, bug loving, football player type girl of your dreams. My older one had been so "princessed-out" in all her former homes that by age 4 she arrived at my house saying "I hate pink and I hate princesses..." Her 1 1/2 year old sister is certainly following in her footsteps... :) You are welcome to "borrow" my 8 year old whenever you feel the urge....:)

  4. Multiple girls at one time scare me, especially when they do that cute little daddy look, and he's oblivious to the fact that he's so getting played....

    Also, to be noted, when we had multiple girls the claws always came out at some point.

    Good luck, if you've passed your FBI background check, you are more than welcome to sleep on the pull out:)

  5. hmm, borrowing an 8 year old. Hmm. Does she do her own laundry?
    My girls can do the Smoosh Daddy look on a moments notice. Of course he hates when they cry.
    Ok so it looks like we'll be driving south when we run away. Our credit cards will be all jacked up at online drugstores but we will stash cash and hope they don't burn it.

  6. I guess I got the best of both worlds.

    On the one hand, Alyssa's room looks like a pepto bismal bottle exploded.

    On the other hand, she loved to go fishing, is Daddy's little helper, and the best part, when she is in the right mood... LOVES TO CLEAN!!!

    Yup, I'm lucky!

  7. Where I come from, two is WAAAAAAAAAAY easier than one. They play together, they dance together, they swing together, they jump rope together. Heck, at times they even pee together (if we're out in public and they both have to go and the bathrooms are crowded. They sit back-to-back. Try it sometime. Saves lots of time.) For all those things they do together, I don't have to do it with them. See? Easy peasy.

    I'm sure life won't always be this easy for me as we approach the teen years, but for now, I can't even imagine one without the other. Two peas in a pod.

    And both are princesses when the situation arises, yet both love to fish, chase fireflies, do karate, go camping, "fight" with light sabers, and dig in the mud. The best of both worlds is what I've got.

  8. Only God creates a 'girly-girl' and no amount of worm-digging, backyard wrestling and co-ed baseball can change that.

  9. Essie,
    She'll do your laundry and fold it and hang it up. She is a tremedous helper whose favorite pasttime these days (besides driving me nuts) is helping me with chores. Won't do hers but happily does mine! Go figure!

  10. SO happy for your friend!

    And off to change my hs from "2" to "1".

  11. OH NO! I dont want to scare anyone off! I am just kidding, really! What the heck do I know anyway!

    Seriously though!


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