I have a weird feeling Genea had already caught a whiff of the pile of shit across the street, probably about 6 weeks ago. I was thinking as I was writing last night. Things bounce around in my brain and from the information I got yesterday combined with the coincidental unexplainable shift in behaviors around here, I realized, Genea may have already had contact (see previous post if none of this makes sense to you) with her first adopted dad.
The Skank had made a point of telling me that the Jack Ass had not been recognized by Genea as far as either of them knew, and I took that at face value. However, they had passed within vision range and within hearing range of each other on one occasion.
About a month and a half ago, give or take a couple weeks, Genea started coming apart. Not in her usual bipolar way, where there are physiological signs. Instead of significantly regressing in 2 or 3 areas as when she is cycling, she has had a moderate regression in almost all areas. Bizarre stuff we haven't seen in ages. Pooping on herself, and sitting in it. Stealing, obvious lying, sneaking around stealing and then lying about it. Wetting the bed increased. She has been agitated, anxious, pacing and walking heavily. Irritable and labile. Low low loooooow focus. Getting up in the night to look for me. Which I don't mind a bit, she comes in bed with me for about 15 minutes and when she feels safe, she goes back to her own bed. The problem is she has been doing it, 3-4 of 7 days for a little longer than a month now, which is the most persistent streak we have ever had.
During the last appointment we had with Genea's psychiatrist, this all came up and we all chalked it up to the change in schedule with winter break and then school starting again. That didn't sit right with me at the time, but I had no better suggestion and it certainly was likely. Genea being the anti-change activist that she is.
This morning I called Genea's former therapist to ask what she thought. I considered that maybe Genea did see and recognize Jack, and has been keeping the information to her self out of terror. Therapist thought that was not likely, because Genea would show more signs like being afraid to go outside in the yard, which has not been the case at all. I also considered that the one time where they passed on the street might have registered with her. Maybe she saw him and had a twinge, and heard him talk and a deep part of her brain recognized the voice, but not specifically, if that makes sense. Maybe she noticed him without realizing who he was and it freaked her out and is still freaking her out and she still doesn't know why.
I can tell you this, Genea is extremely sensitive. Slight shifts of air will gain her attention. She notices everything. If I drop a contact lens, I call Genea to help me find it. If The Husband loses his keys, Genea remembers where he put them. Her school called me today to tell me she was complaining of a stomach ache and a headache. They said she was shaking. The secretary made a point of emphasizing and repeating it. She is shaking. Okay I said, not about to explain anything. I told her, we have all been sick I am sure that's it and I will be right there to get her. She has never once been sick at school before. Never. I truly thought The Husband and I did a bang- up job covering our conversations and moderating our tones of voice last night. But I would bet a million bucks she picked up on the tension and that's what made her sick at school.
Anyway. I did some research today and there may be a possibility of filing for a restraining order based on either stalking laws or psychological harassment. Naturally this subject is not mentioned in any legal statute so just as with everything else, we are trying to do the best we can do without precedence. The Husband is playing voice mail tag with a lawyer, so we will see what he says there.
THANK YOU so much for all the supportive comments, it's really nice to know so many people "have our back". It is just so damn bizarre. Like if I read it in a book I would toss the book aside because there is no way that would actually happen. No one could be that ignorant. It's not even believable.
We own our house. The Skank rents. That Jack has been there for so long already tells me it is probably a "solid" relationship but probably not permanent as she is already twice divorced. She is a real catch, seriously. She is on disability, gets housing assistance, and child support. Most likely food stamps. Jack would never have to work again. I really don't know what he is thinking. We always knew that both of the original adopting parents still lived here in town. I knew there was a chance we would see one of them at the mall, or at a gas station. I thought if we had Genea with us, they would have the sense to tuck away in a corner until we passed. The coincidence of this man finding himself a single skank to live with across the street from us is astounding. The Husband and I are both still mouth-opened about it. He thinks there might be more to it, but I don't. Jack had so little interest in Genea when he was around her, I just don't think that has changed.
Could someone really be so dumb as to think moving in across the street of your formerly adopted child would not have a bad result? Every day I am surprised a little more at how inanely stupid one single person can be.