Innocently I sat, relaxed on a couch enjoying a warm cup of coffee with some Bailey's doused in. Chatting with my wonderful friends about the good and the bad in our lives, we so dearly enjoy our weekly time together. Every Tuesday, almost without fail, a few of us meet out at a tiny local restaurant. It is generally peaceful and quiet. A place sort of like the coffee house on "Friends".
The weather is super crummy. It has been windy and cold all day, and as the evening wore on the snowish sleet built up to that mushy sort of crust. It has snowed, it has hailed and it has sleeted. Teena described it as "the snow is throwing ice at me".
Sometimes at this little cafe we knit. Sometimes we don't, though that is always the intention and we call our selves a knitting group. A knitting group sounds so much nicer than the mom's of the crazy kids group. Anyway. We all have adopted children with "issues" and we hang out and chat. Often about our kids, many times about the many other things going on in the world. It is very normal feeling.
But tonite, tonite there was an ugly interruption. Bad. So very bad.
My phone rang. I briefly had the technological know how and ambition to set my ring tones so that I know who is calling. The Husband for example, his ring tone is frogs ribbeting. My all purpose ring tone is a sort of Bon Jovi- esque rif. I refuse to pay money for the cool ringtones. Actually, I cannot figure out how to get into our cell phone account to buy a cool damn ring tone. Whatever. Fact is, I was already sitting with the few people that call me. That left my sister, my mom or a few other random friends.
It was not any of them.
It was that fucking school. I picked up my phone and looked at the caller ID and it said my daughters school. There is no good reason the school is calling me at 9:30 at night. Nothing good could possibly come out of this. I looked at my friends in shock. How could this be? What could they be calling about?
It hit me.
Sweet Mother of Xanax. It could only be a snow day.
NOT ANOTHER UNHOLY SNOW DAY!
NOOOOOOOOO!
yes.
I have to say though, this is fucking ridiculous. Absolute bull shit. A damned pant load of garbage. How are the children of this country ever going to be educated? HMMMM? How is it that we rank at the bottom year after year when it comes to the education of our children compared to all the other developed nations, and here we are taking a leisurly day off. Just because the snow is throwing ice. Bull. Shit!
I KNOW for a fact that it gets snowy in Canada, and those people are educated. Switzerland, Norway, those are cold places and those folks are smart. Russia is cold and snowy, they go to school there. You can't call a wienie ass snow day every time it flakes in Russia. You'd have a country full of nitwits.
I pay an ass load of taxes on my property to get my children educated. I paid an assload of taxes before I had children. I paid up in advance. AND, I buy lottery tickets all the time. I am not getting my money's worth, that's for sure.
And just in case anyone forgot, or has their own life and failed to memorize mine, we just finished spring break. The kids only went back to school on Monday! Genea no likey change. Genea had a hard enough time with our trip and the school break as it was. I can just about guarantee me some wango tango time tomorrow when she finds this shit out. Whichever fucktarded imbecile made this decision, I want him fired. Fired!
Well that's fine then. Have your fancy pants snow day. I am going to park my kids in front of the tv and let them watch Nick all freaking day. I may stab my ears out with knitting needles to avoid the lyrical sound of The Wonder Pets. Just a warning. Also be warned, this is a rant and I do not preview, edit or spellcheck rants. You get what you get. BAH!
Just got the news from Miss Snippy who flounced into the laundry room, interrupting my Korean English teaching with the snarky announcement "Snow Day, MOM! then she proceeded to drop my phone on the floor. I think she's getting texts galore from her classmates, and I haven't even checked my e-mail yet.
ReplyDelete"Go back to bed!" I suggested.
That's what I'm going to do. The one big snow-day advantage.
So, let me make sure I understand. Someone is a little upset about the snow day?! lol...
ReplyDeleteLol...sorry...
ReplyDeleteSadly, my kids are not the type to go back to bed. They are up at the crack of 7am, sometimes earlier, and that's that. Once they are up, they have to be supervised or my walls will be redecorated in carnation pink crayon.
ReplyDeleteThis sucks. I mean sure it is snowing sideways right now but those buses are big. And anyway, what is the military doing right now? I know for a fact there is no war in Green Bay and they could be using tanks to get the kids to school. Just a thought. GAH.
Just to let you know, we still get snow days in Canada. Just not today!!!
ReplyDeleteMy girl can not go to sleep once she wakes up either. Even if that means she woke up to pee at 4 AM.
ReplyDeleteSnow day here in southwestern Ontario, too - but not for me - since I'm working from home. Boo. We have had an inordinate number of snow days this winter (and spring, now, too, it seems)...as I look out at a road that is wet, but not icy or snowy. Are snow days becoming a socially acceptable means of taking mass "mental health" days? Hmm...
ReplyDeletewell i do admit that i don't really like them myself either. my kids are also the constant supervision type.
ReplyDeletetee hee, I will not even tell you that we have only had 3 snow days this year, oh wait I did just tell you that. Hope you survive! Knit and drink Baileys, it works for me.
ReplyDeleteOk the really bad thing about you having a snow day is that same STUPID ass snow is going to hit me tonite or tomorrow.. WTH? Did mother nature forget SPRING has sprung?? I do not want anymore freakin snowdays here either!! We are already going til the 2nd week of June.. For the love of bacon :(
ReplyDeleteI can one-up you on a Snow Day. We live in "Sunny" California...remember, the place that it never rains. Well, on Sunday it rained, and rained and rained and rained. So what that my husband had to sweep water off the back porch three times and small children could have been washed away by the speed of gushing water rushing to the storm drains.
ReplyDeleteBelieve it or not, our school district gave us an "inclimate" weather day. For RAIN!!!!
It RAINED on Sunday...by Monday, it was sunny and warm...SUNNY.
Gah!
Checking in from Canada here ... also South Western Ontario (Hamilton) and we had our second snow day of the school year. I must say that today it WAS reasonable. The school phones you? We have to check a website ... decision gets made by the school board by 7am the morning of. Our son also does not sleep-in ... EVER! 6 or 6:30am is the norm ... and that's with a black-out shade and silence in the house. (later to bed seems to mean earlier up too - ugh)
ReplyDeleteHow odd.
ReplyDeleteKids here in Oz recently used to get sent home or told to stay home if temp hit 40 (104). Then smart mums fund raised for air con!
I never got sent home cos it was hot. Suck it up in MY day.
Snow days? What are those? Weird...never had one of those as I was homeschooled! I suppose that's not a useful suggestion. :)
ReplyDeleteGood rant by the way. I love a good rant. LOVE THEM.
I love a good rant, too!! Ahhh...did the soul good just to read it. My sentiments EXACTLY.
ReplyDelete(btw, my kids LOVED playing with your girls, and want to know when they can come BACK:). Next time, I'll fire up the blender to make them that clonidine smoothie we had discussed. That will give us more time for knitting).
Thanks for the lovely catharsis I received through reading your rant! I feel much better, actually. And I love your blog. Keep it up!
ReplyDeleteThe phone.... the phone is RINGing.....
ReplyDeleteomg Kellie, I can't believe I didn't think of that! LMAO!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad folks enjoyed the rant- I got more, I will feel free to share!!!
So I am guessing you don't like the snow day?? :-) I can relate, our kids just started back this week from spring break and 6 yr old is not doing very well this week. If we had a snow day I think I'd be really unhappy. As it is, I will have the girls on my own on Sat so it can almost feel like a snow day when it's rainy, cold and windy out.
ReplyDeleteI'd imagine you are about ready for spring right now. And my kids get up at the crack of dawn, about 7ish, too, and they don't go back to bed and pretty much need supervision so I fully know your pain on that one.
Hope the day is going well.
Molly
I personally witnessed the telephone call from the school.
ReplyDeleteI heard the ring, and the next 20 seconds were nearly in slow motion.
I saw Essie reach for the phone. As she peered at the caller id, you could suddenly see her blood turn to ice.
"It's the fucking school!" she hissed in disbelief.
The entire moment made me shiver in a Twilight Zone fashion. My kids are on Spring Break, and my school district is not fancy enough to send out texts about snow days. For a moment, I thought maybe they found a dead body at the school.
In reality, I know ALL TOO WELL that having a fucking Snow Day a day after Spring Break finished is a Horror of Epic Proportion far worse than any dead body.
I am so sorry my friend, for this unfair tragedy. And vent away anytime!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteOh.
ReplyDeleteWell.
The news people have said that our snow storm was the worst snow storm here in 122 years. I have to assume there is not really valid record keeping prior to 122 years ago. So it could have been the worst storm in recorded history as well. I think they exaggerate.
However, I still think they could have got to school. It's not like we have mountains to drive over or anything.
you are the most creative swear-er i ever knew! awesome!
ReplyDeletealso, we have sun and 70 degrees.
your problem is you live in the wrong place!
i still wish i could swear like you. maybe you could move here and teach me!
honey....
ReplyDeleteask Corey for my phone number.
then send me a txt that says "this is Essie".
then.....I will text you a ringtone or two for free.
My personal favorite (even though I don't drink) --- Raise Your Glass, then it would be SO WHAT...then it would be F*cking Perfect....all by PINK.
Yeah....my kids go back on Monday. I will personally take them to the administrators house with eggs and toilet paper in hand and say "have at it" if they cancel school. shit I would help them.
Love Fellow Frozen Tundra if it snows anyfuckingmore I'm going to shoot the weatherman....Soul Sister.
Love Ya,
Gala
too funny!
ReplyDelete