Well quite frankly, I've hit the motherlode on this one. The subject of this week's TTT is the worst gift you have ever received. The sort of thing that if a co-worker were telling you about it, you would not believe them. You wouldn't believe it yourself if it hadn't happened. But it's true, every bit. Bonus points if you can find a photo.
In my life I have one particular offender and ohhhhhh my, offensive she is. I have been gifted with a Sonny and Cher fur vest. A blouse with Christmas trees on it outlined in glitter. Acrylic socks for every holiday. A fake leather "shirt". A rug with a hole cut out for your head to make it a poncho. So many ugly little items that it slowly became clear to me that there was no accident happening here. There had to be deliberation. No one single person could mistakenly obtain that much ugliness without prior planning. No one single person could find that much ugliness attractive and of value.
Last year on my birthday, a big production was made of the gift. Ooh oh oh, she could not wait for me to open this special thing. So excited. Oooh ohoh, had to wait for the explanation blah blah blah because it was so special. I opened a small box in dread knowing that the small boxes usually contained offenses to jewelry. Sure enough, it was a big clunky wire bracelet thing with a chunk of stone on it. Turquoise. And praise the Lord and pass the ammunition, there were earrings to match. I tried so hard to only look at them sideways so as to not damage my vision (I have the same reaction to unfortunate handbags).(I don't hate turquoise, its just not my thing, its pretty on other people).
Now at about this point I am sure people are going, dang you selfish shithead, maybe it wasn't your taste but the thought is what counts. Or wow, lady, give it a rest, geez. But wait, there is more to the story.
The background of the offense to jewelry was the important part. The exciting part. The part that made it special. See, the jewelry belonged to the gifter. As it was told to me, she put the bracelet on herself recently and "decided it wasn't right for" her anymore and so she "should pass it on". You got it, she decided she did not like it any more. That it was time to pass it on. Very close to the exact words.
So was it an important antique?
Was it a family heirloom?
Was it a special thing in any way?
It was just used. Used jewelry for my birthday. That she didn't like anymore and decided it was time to pass it on. To me.