It's the Hard Place Calling

Thank you thank you THANK YOU THAAAAAAAAAAAANK YOOOOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So many people left fantastic, thought-provoking, intelligent and on-target comments from my last post asking for help with my daughter and a school issue. It was great to pull up my blog every few hours to find a new suggestion,  a perspective I hadn't thought of, or just a "dude, that's a rough one, good luck"! Again, THANK YOU!!!!!

Ultimately I am still weighing what frame to work from to make a decision. I have to decide if her academics should be the primary focus, or if I can accept, and if Genea can still be moderately successful if social interaction becomes a factor. Then there is the aspect of a child with Attachment Disorder being allowed to control the show, as it were, and I will get into that again in a minute, as well as the proximity to the teacher providing a safety net, which I had not even considered.

Genea is not on an IEP, and that is not by my choice! I have fully laid out Genea's delayed development, background of neglect, institutionalization, that English is not the language she used her first year of life, that she is diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder and Early Onset Bipolar Disorder, and that there has been massive trauma in her life up to and including events earlier this year. In this state, they have what they call an "Educational Diagnosis" versus a "Medical Diagnosis", essentially for example a child can be diagnosed by a neurologist with Autism Spectrum Disorder but if the school decides that the symptoms do not interfere with learning, you get no IEP. They do not have to provide the BEST possible education, just an appropriate one. So last year I banged and hollered and they finally did a bunch of testing on her to try to qualify her but she hit just above the cutoff line in a few area's, and average in others. This year the teacher went around to everyone for miles evidently to discuss how poorly Genea is doing and they will now try to qualify her under "OHI" which stands for "Other Health Impairment".

I hold not my breath.

Back to the issue of Genea's desk being bumped into the teachers desk and the effects on attachment in a child with Attachment Disorder. A few people pointed out that if Genea is misdirecting attachment with the teacher, than she will likely progress into testing the teacher out in unpleasant ways and move onto controlling and disruptive behavior.

Sigh. SIGH!!!!!! Because I vaguely thought something like that might be happening but did not have all the information. What I have is about a month ago Genea started peaing on herself like a fiend. Like she never met a toilet before and thought they were for growing tomatoes. I mean it has been bad. So bad, the school had to call me when she wet herself twice in one day. Then she decided that was not enough and pooing herself would also be a good idea. So she is peeing herself at school, which is new, and pooing herself at home which is rare. Why, why do these children express themselves out the butt, why???? This is what leads me to decide that Genea is going to have to go back to sitting at a regular desk like everyone else. I worry that it is too late and she will never recover from her dysregulated behavior. And pray tell, how would I go about requesting Genea move to a different class where she does not feel the need to test the teacher out by peeing on all her stuff????? I am currently sending her to school in diapers. I wonder if that would be considered an "OHI".

Genea does have serious problems with her ability to focus and concentrate. She is "hyper vigilant" and feels compelled to constantly check her environment for changes.  I would prefer she lay down on the floor to do work under her own desk with the other kids, if that would help her. Or whatever would work. I think I am going to tell the teacher that I want Genea moved back into a "cluster" a few days before winter break and then stay there following the break. I'll reference social development as my reasoning. Last year with a different teacher she was allowed to get up and sit at a desk in the front of the room up against the chalkboard when she was unable to concentrate. Do you know that Genea initiated moving on her own when she felt the need! Then, she went back to her regular desk when the focused work was done. I think that would be optimal again.

I have mild concerns that this teacher has a case of "poor orphan syndrome" but she definitely likes Genea and wants her to succeed. So do I.

Any other input will be appreciated again!!!